Sunday, July 10, 2005

Funny SMS, send it to others

There are Two Types: Goodies & Naughties
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Devdas ke baap ne kaha GHAR chod do,
Maa ne kaha PARO chod do,
Paro ne kaha DARU chod do,
Magar aap se kisne kaha SMS karna chod do?.............
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Tomakei Khujchi Bangladesh

PM Khaleda Zia ko 500 Black Bengal Goat ki zarurat hai.
Jo Thailand-ke PM ko Gift de sakein.
499 goats jama ho gaye hain,
message padhte hi foran ghar se nikle PM ke Office mein Aa Jao.
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Yaad hai, hum kahan mile the bus stop pe,
Meri car aakar ruki, maine window nechei ki,
Hamari nazron se nazrein mili,
aur tumne kaha:
"Allah ke nam pe ek rupey de do baba"
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A psychological research has proved it that all the dumb, stupid and
fools use their thumb to read messages.
Don't change it now. Its too late.
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Not every flower can express love but rose did it,
Not every tree can stand thrust but Cactus did it,
Not every monkey can use mobile but you did it.
congrats!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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If you find yourself in a dark room where
the walls shaken and blood comes from everywhere
Don’t be afraid,
you are in a safe place.
You are in my heart.
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Tum hamesha muskrate raho...........................
Tum hamesha muskrate raho..........................
Tum hamesha muskrati raho........................
Tum hamesha muskrati raho.........................
mera kia jayega, sab log tumko hi paagal kahen jaaey!!!!!!!!!!!
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Ek son ne apne father se kaha "papa mujko bander dekhna hai abhi!"
Father ne kaha "nahi tum usku abhi nahi dekh sakte."
Son ne kaha "aisa kiun?"
Father ne kaha "Beta bander abhi SMS padhne mein busy hai."
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pata hai..............
pata hai..........
pata hai...........
pata hai..............
SunSilk Mini 2 taka ka ho gaya Hai!
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Jab tum hansti ho, To lagta hai insan pehle bander tha,
Dekho gussa maat hona, kiun ke,
jab tum gussa hoti ho, tu lagta hai insaan aaj bhi bander hai!!!!!!!!!
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Mausam hai suhana ............
aise main dil bhi deewana....
aise main tum........
aise main tum.......
tum........
tum.........
han tum...........
tum............
Lux - - soap se do bar nahana
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If you save this message it means I am cute,
if you edit this, it means I am still cute,
if you forward this message, it means
it means you are spreading that I am cute,
if you delete this message it means that you are jealous because
I am cute!!!!!!!!!
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When all the seas become dry, and
all the birds leave the sky and
all of your friends say good bye; then
no need 2 fear Bcoz
I will b there.
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Thiz cat, iz cat ,a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, an cat,
idiot cat, busy cat, 4 cat, 20 cat, seconds cat.
Got confused with all these cats?
Just Read the line without the word “cat”
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Its a nice feeling when you know that
Some1 loves you, some1 misses you
some1 needs you,
but it feels much better when you know that
Some1 never ever forgets you
thats
ME!!!!!!
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Agar aap ek andherey kamrey mein hon............
kamra baand ho ...............
darwaze pe kundi lagi ho
khidkian bhi bund hon................................
aur koi aap ki neck pe kiss kare to samajh le
ke woh ek
............
...................
MACHAR (Mosquito) hai
ha! ha! ha!
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Jokes- Love Ur Boss

In Memory of all those who love their boss !
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A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead.
"I'm afraid he died last week." she explains.

The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss."I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week."
The next day he calls again and once more asks to Speak to his boss.
By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts, "I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?"

"Coz," he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it..."

Saturday, July 09, 2005

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between the ages of 15-18, a woman is like China or Iran. Developing at a sizzling rate with a lot of potential but as yet still not free or open.

Between the ages of 18-21, a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful with bush land around the fertile deltas.

Between the ages of 21-30, a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.

Between the ages of 30-35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.

Between the ages of 35-40, a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between the ages of 40-50, she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

Between the ages of 50-60, she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.

Between the ages of 60-70, a woman is like England or Mongolia. A glorious and all conquering past but alas no future.

After 70, they become Afghanistan or Pakistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

A true Story from Associated Press(AP), Reported by Kurt Westervelt

Suicide or Murder???

On March 23, 1994 the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound to the head. Mr Opus had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide. He left a note to the effect indicating his despondency.

As he fell past the ninth floor his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast passing through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the deceased was aware that a safety net had been installed just below the eighth floor level to protect some building workers and that Ronald Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide the way he had planned.

"Ordinarily," Dr Mills continued, "A person who setsout to commit suicide and ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended, is still defined as committing suicide."

That Mr Opus was shot on the way to certain death, but probably would not have been successful because of the safety net, caused the medical examiner to feel that he had a homicide on his hands.

In the room on the ninth floor, where the shotgun blast emanated, was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing vigorously and he was threatening her with a shotgun. The man was so upset that when he pulled the trigger he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window striking Mr Opus.

When one intends to kill subject "A" but kills subject "B" in the attempt,one is guilty of the murder of subject "B."

When confronted with the murder charge the old man and his wife were both adamant and both said that they thought the shotgun was unloaded. The old man said it was a long-standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her. Therefore the killing of Mr Opus appeared to be an accident; that is, if the gun had been accidentally loaded.

The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the gun about six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly, loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. Since the loader of the gun was aware of this, he was guilty of the murder even though he didn't actually pull the trigger.

The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of
Ronald Opus. Now comes the exquisite twist. Further investigation revealed that
the son was, in fact, Ronald Opus. He had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten story building on March 23, only to be killed by a shotgun blast passing through the ninth story window. The son had actually murdered himself, so the medical examiner closed the case as a suicide.
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Life is what happens to you when you are BUSY planning OTHER things!!!

Woman ... ON THE LIGHTER SIDE

An woman

An angel of truth & dream of fiction,
a woman is a bundle of all contradiction

She is afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,
but will tackle her hubby alone in the house

She'll take him for better, she'll take him for worse,
She'll break open his head & then be his nurse

Beautiful,keensighted & blind,
crafty & cruel, simple & kind

She'll call him a king then make him a clown,
raise him on a pedestal, then flat down.

She inspires him to deeds that enable a man or,
make him a lackey to carry her fan

She'll run away from him and never come back,
but if he runs away, she'll be on his track.

You fancy she's this but she's that,
She plays like a kitten but bites like a cat.

In the morning she'll sing, in the evening she'll not,
she always does the contrary to what she ought.

Sour as vinegar, sweet as rose,
kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose.

She'll win you in rags, enchant you in skills,
she is stronger than brandy but milder than milk.

In fact revengeful,merry & sad,
hates you like poison but loves you like mad!!!